A woman with long brown hair, wearing a white shirt and black jeans, sitting on a brown leather couch, holding a white mug, with a laptop on her side, smiling at the camera, in a bright room with white paneled walls.
Close-up of white fabric with smooth, soft texture and slight wrinkles.

For women who want to heal deeply

Haley Tolman, LICSW

IFS & EMDR Therapist in Massachusetts & Utah

Let's Connect

The over-thinking and big emotions can feel overwhelming.

You want to respond, not react. You also care about your relationships and don’t want to get stuck in negative patterns.

I get it.

Feeling deeply isn’t a bad thing

If you’re looking for a therapist who gets what its like to be sensitive AND can help you get to the root of your anxiety, people-pleasing, and heal trauma - then you’re in the right place!

A woman with long, dark, wavy hair smiling, wearing a white shirt and beige blazer, standing against a plain white background.

hi, I’m haley

I help women who feel stuck repeating the same patterns, even though they are insightful & self-aware.

I help my clients connect to their curiosity & self-compassion, so they can get to know themselves better, and understand the impact of their past experiences.

Talk therapy can be helpful to process emotions and identify patterns, but it doesn’t always create lasting change - Together we can go deeper.

  • By sensitive, I mean people who feel things deeply, are highly empathetic, tend to be perfectionistic, have high expectations of themselves, and find it easy to get overwhelmed. There is a term for this biological trait called a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). It’s not a disorder or mental illness, it’s someone who has a sensitive nervous system.

    Never heard of an HSP? Click here to learn more.

A person sitting on a bed using a laptop, writing in a spiral notebook with a pen.

How I work

I truly welcome every part of you in therapy.

By making space for all the different parts of you, it can bring clarity to what you’re feeling inside and increase your self-compassion. And I’m talking about ALL the parts of you: the anxious parts, the critical parts, the angry parts, the parts of you that try to do therapy “right,” and the ones that feel hurt and alone.

You’ve probably done everything you can think of already to cope, or even tried therapy before. And yet, it doesn’t seem to bring the change you are looking for. I can help you better understand yourself, so you feel less conflicted, anxious, and overwhelmed.

First

We’ll get to know each other. We’ll talk about what’s important to you, what works well for you, what doesn’t, and address any fears you might have.

Then

We’ll explore the internal dynamics and patterns you are noticing. We’ll identify any blocks or concerns, and pinpoint past experiences that have been difficult for you.

Next

I’ll guide you through some internal work to gain clarity, shift your reactions and feel more self-compassion. We may reprocess past experiences to reduce stress & overwhelm.

Finally

We’ll determine what other supports might be helpful. Then you can reflect on new insights you’ve gained, mindfulness practices, and ways of meeting your needs better.

Smiling woman sitting on a rattan chair in a bright, minimalist room with white walls and a green houseplant.

I want you to know that…

My training in IFS and EMDR therapy means I have the experience to help you do the deep work, and finally see change. I’m passionate about the transformative power of befriending yourself, and consider it a privilege to work with you in the process. I love seeing how my clients change their relationship with themselves and shift deep-rooted beliefs for the better.

I also want you to know that you’re working with someone who “gets” what it means to be sensitive. I get it, because I’m also a highly sensitive person (HSP) and understand the deep feelings, the overwhelm, and tendency to do things the “right way.”

I know that doing deep work requires a safe space, choice in the process, and moving gently through difficult things. Painful experiences can be impactful, but it doesn’t mean they define who you are or have to keep you stuck. Sometimes all we need is a little help to feel better, especially if you’ve already tried to make changes on our own.

IFS Therapy
EMDR Therapy

Therapy with me is…

  • I genuinely believe in the power of compassion. I’ve seen how it can transform the way we feel towards ourself and others.

    I will approach your unique challenges with COMPASSION, not criticism.

  • I have specific training that helps us go beyond coping skills and talk therapy. I will help you make sense of your inner world and reduce the impact of stressful past experiences.

    I’m here to guide you through the process and get to the root of your challenges. No temporary bandaids or telling you to " just try harder" here.

  • I understand the need to move gently through challenging experiences and emotions, so it's not too overwhelming.

    I provide as much choice as possible to you through the process, while still maintaining a focus on your goals.

    I want you to see the change you are looking for, while still listening to your own needs during the process.

  • My holistic approach means I'm making space for all parts of you, even the ones you don’t like. I help you connect to them, so you have more clarity on your inner experience.

    I consider your overall physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual wellness - not a diagnosis.

  • I'm LGBTQ+ affirming, and welcome all races, religions, and backgrounds in my practice.

    I strive to be inclusive and informed on the biases I might hold with each of my clients.

Woman sitting on a white sofa using a laptop in a bright, minimalist room with a wooden side table, plants, and books.
Close-up of white fabric with soft texture and slight folds.

I specialize in:

My Training & Education

  • -Master of Social Work - Boston College

    -Bachelor of Social Work - Utah State University

    • Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker (LICSW) - Massachusetts

    • Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) - Utah

  • -IFS Therapy:

    • Level 1- IFS Institute

    • Level 2- IFS Institute

    • Program assistant for IFS level 1 trainings

    • Participation in ongoing IFS consultation

    -EMDR Therapy:

    • Certified EMDR Therapist: EMDR International Association

    • EMDR Basic Training: EMDR-HAP

    EMDR Advanced Trainings:

    • EMDR & Complex Trauma

    • Treating Dissociative Disorders with EMDR

    • EMDR for Suicidal & Self-Harming Behaviors

    • Mastering EMDR therapy intensives

    -IFS & Highly Sensitive People:

    • IFS Therapy for Highly Sensitive People - Martina Williams Workshop

    -Therapy Intensives:

    • Therapy intensive training for therapists - Intensive Design Lab

    • Mastering EMDR Therapy Intensives

Logo of IFS Institute with stylized circles and the text 'IFS Institute' and 'Internal Family Systems'.
Badge with the logo 'emdia' and text 'EMDR International Association' and 'EMDR Certified Therapist'

Ready to work with me?

Get Started